Be Stylish Be Classy Yet Authentic

After writing some heavy blogs , I wanted to keep this week light , easy and breezy but with meat to ponder upon. This idea came up after I had posted few pictures some on whatsapp , some on instagram and with every comment I had received compliment that I have always maintained the grace irrespective of the dress I had worn and some asked how do I maintain that. First of all ,Thanks for the compliments everyone and I will like to pass some of the credit to my grandmom , she taught me most of my dressing style. She was the most stylish and graceful lady I have ever met , I can be 10% baised towards her :-). For me style is the extension of my thoughts which I believe in or resonate with. If after 20 years you see yourself in any dress and you have hide then that's not stylish in my definition.

First rule of the thumb, Wear what you like not what  trend people are following or  market is oozing about .Make your own trend, Be you , this will not only makes you stand out from the crowd but also help you in all front of life because you are wearing what you love and there is unsaid happiness in it and it will be shown in your behaviour while interacting with people around you.

In my own cousin's wedding I wore the gown which when I had my first trial made me feel like princess and was just made for me . End result, I was happy and was on top of the world and pictures reflect that ... I was even questioned by my near and dear ones for that  and was given suggestion to wear a lehenga .I choose the dress because that was the authentic me and I was happy being me , Shred the voices around you and learn to hear your inner voice , trust me you will sleep better and enjoy the moment

Second rule of thumb, whatever you wear, you should be comfortable in your skin. The test I do is if I have to walk in that room and if my father or grandmom is there whether he or she  would be comfortable to see me . That person could be  anybody you respect. It's not about the full length or cut sleeves or anything you wear but how you carry that dress. If you are not comfortable in the dress it will show in some form

I had once travelled to Norway with white theme in my mind , I had worn white offshoulder dress. Those pics are the best pics of mine because I was comfortable , even for shoes I could have worn high heels but for me comfort was important so I wore the red sneakers and carried with panache.If somebody would have asked me to hike that day I could have done . I had gone to travel so walking comfortably yet looking elegant was my ask and I owned that look. Picture will speak louder about it.

If I have to put philosphical , there is a very thin line between bikni and lingerie , never forgot that difference

Third rule of thumb , never wear anything which doesn't add to your charm . Be it the cloth fabric you select or the colour you choose . Everything has to be authentic and charming to that level. Any colour dress which is not comfortable to you , you will not be able to wear why bother others with rude mood  just because you are not comfortable. Each dress you wear should bring out the signature of who you are.
Like I am not comfortable with leopard print at this stage and nobody ever saw me wearing it in last 2-3 years. I have a more affinity towards pink and a lot get reflected with ease I carry shades of pink . Wear the colour that makes you feel more vibrant and energized . Choose and own it.

Fourth rule , dress has to fit on you , like it was meant for you . If the fitting of the dress isn't right , there is something missing and you will give away in your expression so be you. I had my days also where I had worn something which was either too tight or too loose and that reflected in my body language ... So now just dress to kill

Fifth rule , wear the attire as per the place. When in rome do as roman do.  This is important because you want to stand out of the crowd with your signature style but you don't want to look out of the place. Like I never wear offshoulder dress or party dresses to office . I am not into modeling industry. In India , I always try to wear  min. calf length dresses. It's nothing wrong in wearing short dresses but just that people around are not ready to see me in that avatar in person and I don't mind wearing denim with long kurtis for my safety :-)

Lastly , I don't add mulitiple things in one look and try to use the basic theme to enhance the overall look. Normally my dresses will be in one basic colour or some very basic embroidery or simple cuts or  some light flowery prints to blend with my skin texture .Dress I wear should enhance me not other way round. Too much of anything will make it look cluttered and that's not who I am . I get put off after looking at heavy worked suit, dresses. If I have one theme , I try to accessorize minimal and suit that theme . Minimisalism is the motto that works for me. Classy is my mantra and I want to carry it thoughout my life

Hope these tips were worth reading for you also . It was fun for me to revisit my own picture and define my style

Everywhere you go add a little sparkle of who you are and enjoy the magicland being created

Unbreak the Feminist facade

The idea of this blog came from the very comment from one of my dear friend whom I value a lot. This made me realize writing has its own cons that without example taciturn writing can lead to miscommunication. To avoid being heard incorrectly for my thoughts. I am choosing on write on what feminism, true essence of being feminist is and why many dread the word now

So what is Feminism? Feminism is nothing but a movement that helped woman have equal rights and opportunities as men. It is all about leveling up the playing field for the genders to have fair and square game. Therefore, does that mean are man and woman same? No but it just means if I want to a fighter and I should not be said I cannot because I have different set of genitals.

If this was so simple, why is that woman now days run away from being called feminist? I myself was shying away to attach the word feminism in this article. Somehow, somebody has to bring the elephant in the room and the most dreaded woman. Irony of the situation is the feminism relates to the masculinity. The job where personalities of being strong , vocal and assertive like CEO of the fortune 500 companies, Engineer etc are considered to be feminist. If the goal of feminist is to be accepted in the roles earlier played by, men then I will be sorry to say we are falling in the trap of patriarchy. The idea of feminism is to give due to respect to each woman’s knowledge, strength and experiences and embrace it well. A woman who is wearing pink dress orchestrating a board meeting can be as feminist as a woman wearing a black saree in confines of her home. It about her choice and not to be judged by other people but at that same time it should not be about bra burning. It shouldn’t be hating any gender or any person based on their choices but about embracing, respecting each other . So next time  when you see a woman consider her to as feminist as a  woman wearing saree living creating home with her presence or a single mother or spinster or woman embracing home , business with ease and choice .

And as woman based on my experience, if we are fighting the war of who is better please God we have already lost it. Each one of us bring their own uniqueness to make this universe a better place. So when we have limited time in the world let’s choose our battle wisely. World can exist only with balance of yin and yang energies. If we strive to be the best we should use of our feminine qualities alongwith embracing the business acumen. 

And one last thing , as nail in coffin , I have met more men to be feminist than woman so feminism is not gender based but a thought that everybody deserves the opportunity based on their skills and merit

Who do you want to be ? A strong Woman !!!

While thinking for what I could write for my fellow female travellers on this journey today. What topic to pick , I came across the quote " A woman is like a tea bag—you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water." —Eleanor Roosevelt.

It triggerred my chain of  thought why we call woman strong even though we can also see woman being fragile and docile . If a woman hasn't learnt the art of self defense she can't withstand in the fight with a man , then why are we called as strong ? May be because we have the capacity to nurture a baby and carry them for 9 months . So strength is nothing but quality of being strong . Power to resist force . By this logic all the woman are strong since almost all woman have been harmed , exploited or mistreated by men to an extent be it any part of the world while still maintaining the general loving view towards life and people around her . Nuturer in most of the woman is still alive.

But when pages of history will be reopened we will few names written in bold as the woman of strength . let's explore some names here and see what made them so unique that their names got engraved with gold. With woman known as strong but in different genre. On one hand we have  Joan of Arc who was a fighter, soldier and a noble woman  and on another hand we have Marilyn Monroe who was the face of epitome of beauty and fantised by all men . If the fantsy was the end result why don't we know about Lady Godiva . Wait before you say who is she ? She was the one who when provoked by her husband that he will only listen to her when she walks on streets of town naked  and did so. She has also shown the courage to do so that in way back twelfth century. Way before Marilyn did so and list her name never appears in the list of strong women. So when we  talk about strength , people don't see and talk strength in average. So when we see lot of skin show in today's world this is not the mark of the strong woman but it's way more than what meets the eyes. 

It is more of the inner strength and not be compared with men because have different scenarios to deal with and have different needs also . Strong woman builds , supports , love and care . A strong woman is one who is able to reflect on life , guide and protect 

With this definition I hope we all choose to  be strong woman who support and build each other even scratch each other's back if required but never to snatch the crown from other person.

"A strong woman understands that the gifts such as logic, decisiveness, and strength are just as feminine as intuition and emotional connection. She values and uses all of her gifts." —Nancy Rathburn

Ways to ease anxiety with EFT

All of us have been struck by the Co-Vid 19 recently and it has recently put all of us in the uncertain times and uncertainity at its peak

I was one of them who was taken off gaurd and not knowing where future will take me now .

Strangely somebody from my friend circle introduced me to EFT .  It helped me calm during these times when I was alone so thought it might help you also so sharing it 

What is EFT ?

EFT is Emotional Freedom Technique to ease the pain from emotional and physical distress . As per EFT , negative energy is caused by distruption . It works on the merdian points to bring the balance back 

It let you to first acknowledge your problem and your feeling then helps you acknowledge it 

And accept yourself with it 

It lets you have the power in your hand . When you are struck by the panic this mehod will help

P.S.: if I get enough people interested I will do 15-20 min zoom call to calm your mind with right statements